Is My Mother Safer Now?

March 21, 2020 I felt devastated yesterday. The night before, the governor of California had ordered the entire state to Stay Home. I had plans but they were all canceled. Why did this upset me so much? My plans were just the mundane busyness of my life and now they were interrupted by a health …

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Why Rape Survivors Don’t Do What We Think They “Should” Do

The sexual assault allegations that catapulted the hashtag #MeToo into a viral phenomenon reshaped our collective consciousness around consent; and yet our culture and our laws are still mired in the same old victim blaming that has prevented any meaningful movement toward a sexual landscape that would afford us the safety and clarity that we …

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Breaking Free of Codependency

When I finally sobered up and extricated myself from an abusive relationship, I knew I needed help. That same year Melody Beattie published her book, Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself. The year was 1986 and Melody’s book was very popular in recovery circles. I found her book, …

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Good Sex is Messy!

Truly ecstatic sex expands our senses and explodes our inhibitions. The best sex asks us to let go of our need for things to look a certain way and to dive into sensation and emotion without fear or judgment. But many women have difficulty experiencing their full capacity for pleasure because they are afraid of …

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